Can’t Bear It….

Published May 20, 2012 by Sara

My Uncle is sick, really sick. He has Heptocellular Carcinoma (Liver Cancer) and Cirhossis of the liver, both of which are highly treatable on their own, but with the two combined, make for a very lethal combination. 

We were hoping to go for a visit over the summer, which still may happen, but not to see my Uncle. Right now, we are into the countdown. He’s still alert, but he doesn’t follow conversation very well and at times, rarely knows who he is talking to. I called him the other day and it was so sad, I don’t think he even knew who he was talking to, being as if he knew, he would have said, “Well hey there Sarie!” And I would reply back with, “Well, how ya doing Uncle Stuie?”

I am such a bundle of emotions and memories that aren’t even related to him are coming. I’ve been thinking a lot about when I was a kid living in Seattle and playing in my front yard. I’ve been thinking about my Mom, which has been coming up a lot on conversation with my cousin Brian. He lost his Mom, I lost mine, now we’re losing his Dad, my Uncle. Which sadly, sounds like I had a great relationship with him versus his son. But there are always two sides to every story and I am not sure just how much Brian is embellishing on. 

Which now makes me feel bad for our parents upbringing, which this came up a lot when my Mom was dying. 

They had it rough, all of them, with the exception of my Aunt Carol. She was adopted by my Aunt Glennie (whom I always called Grandma), when she was a newborn. My Uncles and my Mom had to fend for themselves growing up, that is until the state removed my Mom. Then my Uncles decided there was no need for them to stick around and they ran away from home. 

But I love, how even though they had it rough. How they all stayed in touch and were incredibly close despite their circumstances. 

So I really won’t be blogging too much since I just have way too much going on my end. But I could never feel more trapped and helpless by not being able to go to Minnesota to see my Uncle, which whom I kinda looked at him like a father, in some way.

I do plan to post my review for the Vox Box I got in the mail of goodies and free samples. 🙂

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